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This is how I find myself waiting for "Sophia Loren".

She seems rather on edge and sends me a text message at the time we're due to meet asking why I'm using the website.

Her photograph reveals that the hour has stretched to 90 minutes.

She has declined to tell me her name, so I have to think of her as her web sobriquet.Trying to watch Netflix in tandem with a friend or significant other across the country always seems like a good idea, but it can be frustrating.Coordinating pressing play the first time is easy enough, but when you get up to get more popcorn, or you miss what someone was saying, it’s annoying to get back in sync.I register, and enter the murky world of two-timing technology, taking note of the warning on the site: "Not all affairs have a positive effect on a marriage." What a masterpiece of understatement.I wonder if anyone has ever read this, seen the wisdom of it and decided not to join. "I'm witty, charming, handsome and modest, and I'm kind to animals," I write, hoping this description will have a fairly broad appeal, and also include a recent photograph.

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So I paid £119 for a month's membership, giving me an entre to thousands of faithless females.

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